Organising with kids
If I had the secret to living an organised life with kids and charged a dollar to each parent I would be pretty comfortable. I don’t know the only or “best” way to parent and do organising with kids. But I do have several ideas about organising and kids, as well as a number of years of parenting under the belt that might help you along.
Getting organised with young kids – Toddlers
As soon as children start to crawl, walk and talk you can start some form of organising with kids. If the child can take toys out, it can put them back. You can do a little pack-up routine with the child. This can be funny, you could use music, some dancing and basically give them a life skill through positive reinforcement.
The key thing at this age:
Don’t expect miracles
Have a clear toy spot
Make putting toys away very easy – open (colourful) storage containers are best.
Getting organised with school-aged kids
As they grow each year you can add some more responsibility.
At a minimum primary school-aged children should be able to:
To clear their bag
Grab or clean their lunch box
Work with school notes (at home and school)
They can do small chores like:
Emptying the bin
Dusting
Doing an easy section with the vacuum cleaner
Wipe the table
Older primary kids can start to:
Take responsibility for their bathroom (shower, bath and toilet)
Learn how to use budgeting software (the price they pay if they want pocket money and are interested in money)
During school holidays
Clean the car
Wash the balcony
Wipe down windows
Work together with them
Declutter the clothes they don’t fit
Count their pocket money
Shop for new clothes
File away papers from last school year
In my experience:
I find that if you do this with the kids tend to come along on the ride. We have little traditions during the school holidays in which we declutter clothes, and buy new and fitting ones. This is done over several days so as to not to burn out either the child or the parent, we often complete the shopping outing with a nice lunch and some one-on-one time.
When you give kids a new task I would show them what to do and how to do it but also give them leeway to come up with their own way. At the end of the day if they like to use a different cloth or spray from what I would. Who cares? The area still gets cleaned and they have a sense of empowerment.
Be specific when organising with kids
I have also noted that in the primary you need to be very specific and only give one task at a time. Where adults can see what needs to be done when we say “let’s tidy up dinner”. For kids this means nothing. It worked better to say please fill the water bottles, wipe the food off the table first with a tissue, then shine the table with the cloth and spray bottle. Or bring your plate to the kitchen. As adults we don’t realise that tidying up could have 20 different very clear micro-actions. “Tidying up” however means nothing as a statement. A child could be confused when asked to tidy up: what, how, why? As adults, we reply “because it is messy”, again a verbal or mental rebuff: what, where, why? Meaning nothing gets done as the child simply doesn’t know what action is required.
Be patient
One of the key parenting things I am known for is being the parent that has taught her primary-aged kids to do a budget. This includes having enough money to buy their own clothes, gifts and have spending money. It also includes the ability to do online banking and bank reconciliations from the bank to the budgeting software. I know most adults would squirm. The times I wanted to throw in the towel stop teaching them and forget about this life skill is more than I can count on one hand. However, they are now both teens and before they go out in the workforce they know how to allocate money, save, and budget. Even in the few short years of primary school, I have seen them improve in confidence, ability, and being comfortable with their skills.
Moral of the story even if they or you won’t get it right at first keep at the organising and decluttering skills set. It is a great opportunity to grow together.
Organising with older kids - Teenagers
I see my role as preparing the children for their lives as adults. If you don’t teach them life skills like decluttering, cleaning and organising. You are doing yourself and them a disservice in the long run (and yes I hear you in the short term it is much easier to do it yourself).
Teenagers are interesting if for nothing else than their fluctuating moods (I am living the dream as this is written). After years of regular decluttering and organising clothes, their rooms, and teaching them about finance and budgeting. My babies are pretty receptive to learning new things and have seen how organising and declutter has helped in their own lives.
During these teenage years I want to focus on:
Extending their skills with finances $$
Teaching them how to cook (after years of having that pressure they can start to cook one day a week – it is a win-win for everyone).
Helping them plan their study, with daily habits and year planners. These skills I hope will be gold come time for them to join the workforce.
Supporting them in navigating a digital world unknown to me when I was younger and completely foreign in their grandparent’s era.
Children have more opportunities, but also more, complexity, information, and distraction in their young lives. You don’t have to do everything perfectly but show there are ways to calm the chaos, to organise life, and feel you are steering the ship rather than being pushed around by live events.
I also want to:
Include them in cleaning the house (they live there as well)
Family or financial decisions
Having family habits from the shared cups of hot chocolate and tea to shared meals and yearly organising (including holidays).
What if I haven’t been organised so far?
Start today, not as a big “gun-ho” activity but more as a regular practice with small organising challenges and lots of rewards and encouragement.
As the saying goes:
The best day to start organising was 20 years ago, the second-best time to organise is today.
My journey so far
As I have focussed on organising from the time my youngest was 6 weeks and my eldest 2.5 years they have grown up with the idea that organising is important. Is our home and life perfect? Far from it but they have seen the struggles, projects, and successes. Have and will I get everything right? Not remotely but I am hoping to give them the invisible skill of knowing several ways to declutter, clean, and organise their lives, one step and one day at a time.
Organised with kids
I would love to know your tips and tricks please add them to the comments.